Perceptions, Perspectives & Problems
When I wrote Mind Files years ago, the publisher tried to convince me to remove the subtitle because it contained the word problem. Keep perceptions and perspectives - they said - that’s good, but the word problem doesn’t give people hope. Hope? Hope is just a different prison - the one you enter before you’re actually ready to heal. Hope keeps you from reaching that bottom you must reach before you’re ready and willing to do the work to climb out of the darkness. Hope keeps your personal power out of reach.
Yeah - buckle up. I’m done with the gentle, nurturing approach. It’s time for a push.
Our childish perceptions - which isn’t a criticism but a statement of fact - create rigid perspectives, and those rigid perspectives create problems in our lives. Our belief systems were created in childhood. They’re immature, outdated, and useless. Understanding that difficult truth is the first step in healing. The next step requires action. You have to apply the first step to yourself—to your life—and if you are successful, you will find your way to the third step, which is reconnecting with The All - or God - or The Universal Mind - whichever word you use to describe the unprovable all-knowing thing that created us.
We live in a fast-food society where we have become accustomed to instant gratification. If we want information, we search the high-speed internet. Entertainment is as easy as a click of the mouse and can occupy hours and hours of our day if that’s what we want. We can easily find numerous ways to experience pleasure and pain online, but what we can’t obtain quickly online or anywhere else is healing. We can find numerous sources that present a path, but if we genuinely want to heal, we have to do the work, and, well, that doesn’t happen quickly. When the going gets tough - most people quit.
You have to want something - really want it - to muster the tenacity it takes to move through it. If you want to look like an athlete, you have to work out - every day. You have to watch what you eat - every meal. You know if you’re doing what you need to do by looking in the mirror. It’s easy to visually see your progress.
When I had to learn how to walk again after every single surgery, I had to do the work. Not the physiotherapists, chiropractors, or massage therapists. Me. I had to choose. I could either push through the pain and walk or claim victimhood, give up, and stay in the wheelchair for the rest of my life. I chose the latter.
If you want to be successful in a world of corporate sharks, then you have to become a bigger shark, and that takes effort because it will force you to become something you were never supposed to be. Competition is a nasty game, and if you want to play it well, you had better be smarter and a really good conniver; otherwise, you’ll fail. How bad do you want it? Are you willing to sell your soul to get there?
If you want to live a life free from your traumatic past, then you have to put effort in every day. No, you won’t retraumatize yourself. That’s victim mentality. You are in control of your mind - not the trauma, and besides, you’ve already come out the other end. You’re here, aren’t you? Wounded though you may be, but you’re here. And why in the hell would you adopt trauma you didn’t personally live through? Do you really need to add accounts of the experiences of others to your FEAR cabinet? Why? You didn’t have enough misery in your own childhood? You need to add more?
Know thyself means just that. THY self. It doesn’t mean that you should dig through the history of your ancestral line to find more trauma so you can create more Mind Files to deal with. Name an ethnic group of people that didn’t suffer at some point in history. NAME ONE. Before the English Empire was born - these are the colonialists that the progressive left (that’s an oxymoron if I ever heard one) is so enamored with blaming today - they were conquered by the Romans long before they were the big dog on the porch. And it’s not like every person who lived in that empire was part of the empire. I’m Canadian. I live here and I vote - well I used to anyway - but I am 100% NOT part of the government’s insiders. I have zero say in what goes on in this country, so how in the hell should I be held responsible for what the psychopaths masquerading as servants of the people do? The system doesn’t work, and here’s a news flash for you - it never did. Haven’t we all learned that yet? Do you really think it was any different hundreds or even thousands of years ago?
Blame is blame. Of course, you can continue to give your power away to whomever you choose. Stay a victim. It’s your life.
However, if you’re ready to take the first step out of the dark hole of generational trauma - ask yourself how the behaviors of the people you came into contact with during your childhood - that’s everyone - parents, grandparents, siblings, teachers, coaches, pastors, friends - how did interacting with them negatively impact you? How? Why? What specific narratives did you form about them? Why? Do those rigid perspectives serve you well today or when you look at them from an adult perspective - or at least a different one from yours - are they outdated?
You’re not a victim. You might have been victimized, but you’re not a victim. Quit behaving like one. Choose to start climbing out of the trauma trap, or better yet, bulldoze a path through it.